SARASWATI

In FICTION by Yeshen2 Comments

How to formulate my love supreme & devotion into words? Well, as a small child from humble beginnings in Pitsmoor, Sheffield, England, I was awakened by music, poetry and the arts, beatboxin’, writing poems and doing artwork. I met my root guru Ankhu Ra at this time aged seven and he said something which has stuck with me ever since. He told me to use my gifts in the arts to transform all my negative thoughts, emotions and feelings and that with Elimu (education) this would be my way out of the ghettos of the mind. Here I discovered Saraswati and my practice, which has been a part of my life ever since. I started producing and composing in my teens after a band member & mentor called Ninja Peculia inspired me to make beatz and this has always kept me balanced in heart and mind.

Being born into a family without a father, poverty-stricken, surrounded by all of life’s social, ethical and moral ills, it was extremely difficult to find my way. As a small child, all I had was the three jewelz, my poetry, music, elimu and the arts to keep me from ending up like most of my old friends: dead from overdoses of drugs, in prison, a drug dealer, a pimp or a gangster. The Pitsmoor streets were no joke back then, people getting stabbed, shot, or beaten up; it was hellish! I emulated my root guru from an early age, which got me ostracized from by peer group in my late teens, and being the only Dzogchen practitioner in Sheffield at that time, I felt lonely, isolated and deeply depressed.

I felt misunderstood by my family, friends and girlfriends. So, I went back to the Imhotep School where I met my root guru to see if I could find him, because for many years I hadn’t seen him because he’s elusive. Auspiciously I saw him a few more times and he gave me many of his heart advice’s. Such as, ‘Elimu is lifelong; better to buy a book than to buy weed! Sit, and do your meditation. Go, go, to the cemetery, practice there!’ So I did, for many, many years, night and day.

The goddess Saraswati.

Even though I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder aged twenty-five after many hospital admissions, only my practice kept me well. My faith grew exponentially as a result of this. Even though people mocked me, laughed at me and called me a madman, I continued practicing. Drukpa Kunley was a major inspiration from this time onward. Aged thirty I finally left Sheffield and ended up becoming homeless for eleven months in Cheshire in the same winter that my mother was dying of cancer. My practice kept me alive even though I didn’t have my musical instruments with me! What did I do? Beatbox of course! Luckily I ended up living in Manchester. Where I now have a family of my own. My humble heart advice which I have learned through experience in the thirty-six years I have been alive is this:

Please, be aware of the dangers of over-privileging the earth element.
Solidity and objectification leads to polarization and the one thousand things.

Please, be aware of anger.
When caught by this destructive energy, everything in it’s path burns and only dust remains.
This is destructive to both oneself and others.
Better than burning in fire, sooth one’s self and others
transforming it through practice into Monsoon rain clouds of auspiciousness
which act instantaneously putting out all the flames.

Please, abandon the goal.
The goal conveys a linear trajectory associated with gain, effort
and a mentality of ‘I must try harder!’
When in actuality it’s paradoxical.
Effortless-effort is required on the path.

Good times come and go.
Hard times come and go.
Please, no matter where you find yourself in life,
Keep practicing for the benefit of all beings.
Please, keep your practice simple so even a small child could do the same.

Adults have forgotten how to play like children!
Here is how one’s youthful candle quickly burns out!
Play! Have fun too,
otherwise the stiffness of a corpse is all people will see.

Please, don’t be too serious.
Your face may stick that way.
Remember, your face is for the other.
So a balance of playtime is essential.

Please don’t gas your head up.
‘I’m so and so. I’m an important person.’
Be quiet and calm like you’re in a library.
So keep a low profile!

Better to be alone looking at the sky,
than surrounded by a crowd of fools.
What the worldly think is attainment,
the wise do not!
So be aware of who you emulate.
Be fearless, courageous and forget hope.
Have confidence!

These seven pieces of heart-advice
were written by The Bucked Toothed Buffalo
also known as Yeshen.
So that others may walk well and not make my mistakes!

Madasi—a thousand thank you’s—GURU!!!

About the Author
Yeshen

Yeshen

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I am a visual artist, poet, writer, music producer and dzogchen practitioner. I’m also an amateur photographer & keen etymologist. I use my artistic expressions as a means to positively uplift others with the old school motto P.E.A.C.E = Positive. Energy. Activates. Constant. Elevation. Yeshen’s Soundcloud presence.

Photo by Nick Hedges.

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Comments

  1. “Please, abandon the goal.
    The goal conveys a linear trajectory associated with gain, effort
    and a mentality of ‘I must try harder!’
    When in actuality it’s paradoxical.
    Effortless-effort is required on the path.”

    Beautiful. Realising “Effortless effort” is the crux of whole religious/spiritual endeavour.

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