Welcome to my experiment.
I have decided to give myself a challenge. To live for 30 days on a vegan/RAW diet, and to give up unhealthy habits. To be honest, it wasn’t really a decision. It happened very naturally. I drove home from work and I stopped at the gas station to put gas in my car. I was so hungry and my two-year-old daughter was asking for an ice-cream. I thought to myself, why not give her a little treat, it’s going to be long before dinner is ready. And why not give myself a little treat, I am going to be hungry for the next hour if I don’t get something quick. I bought a small ice-cream, a bag of chips and a Snickers. We ate it all. Already in the car, I could feel a sense of uneasiness. Thoughts about health, consciousness, the state humanity is in, health-wise and environmentally. I felt guilty. I knew better than this.
Later I imagined myself as a vessel. A vessel of energy formed as matter, a body. This vessel I could fill up with healthy foods or I could fill it up with unhealthy foods. What would happen to me if I continued to fill it with the unhealthy? Would I even be able to feel connected to nature? Would I become dumber? Would I develop cancer, arthritis and degenerate faster than I could even imagine? The bag of chips tasted sour and salt, too artificial to be any kind of nourishment for my body.
I knew right there, it was time to change. You might want to know a little background info about my life and the food in it. I was raised a vegetarian. Both my parents were very conscious about living healthy, respecting nature, the planet and taking good care of the body. It wasn’t until my teens that I started being a flexitarian, someone who is flexible enough to eat whatever is served. I guess a part of me wanted to rebel, and rebelling for me was to fit in, to become normal. In the 90’s it wasn’t that normal to be vegetarian as it is now.
I am now 31, still flexing all over the place, somehow the feeling of wanting to fit in, and not cause to much trouble by always being different from all the others, have caused me to still be vague about my choices. But I know what I believe in and that will never be vague. I believe that the large consumption of meat and animal products are harmful for humans, for animals and for the environment. I believe most of our food is poisonous. I believe we are degenerating both physically and mentally by not being in tune with nature.
So what do I mean when I say “not being in tune with nature”? I know the difference very clearly, because I am a flexer, remember. If I am in tune with nature, my whole body shines and craves only clean food. Simple, natural, clean food. My body also becomes more beautiful. I don’t feel so awkward in it. I feel strong, beautiful, it even looks good with hairy legs. When I am in tune with nature, my actions come from a place of calmness, a place of beingness. It feels simple. When I am in tune, I do not seek outside of myself to validate my worth. I feel my worth a thousand-fold, I respect, and honor myself.
That became one glorified side of the story, but it is nevertheless how it feels for me. You can guess how it feels to be out of tune. This leads me back to the challenge. I want to stop poisoning my body with chemicals and unhealthy foods. Already today I thought about that beautiful quote: “Do, what makes you happy”. It felt so empowering to do what makes me happy. Such a simple thing, but apparently an important thing.
I started a vegan diet a few months ago, with the occasional slips here and there, but I eliminated all animal products for the sake of the innocent animals that we treat terribly. It wasn’t so difficult because there are many good products for vegans and my diet wasn’t that animalistic anyway. The only thing I hung unto was all the sugars, the chips and the fast food. When I started working full-time a month ago, as single mother, it felt as if making good and healthy food was an unsurmountable task. I skipped meals, I ate unhealthy fast-food, chips, sugars and slowly developed a bad habit of being careless about what I ate. I have always been extremely sensitive to unhealthy food. If I eat too much sugar, I get a horrible rash in my face, red and itching. My body has a super-quick reaction to anything I eat. At times it felt as a curse, but in truth, it’s really a gift. My body is telling me exactly what I should be doing, it told I was mistreating it. I started feeling more low on energy, tired, my body aching, my skin itching, my craving for sugar increasing.
I guess that rush of guilt had accumulated over some time until it suddenly shook me up and opened my eyes. I am going to be radiantly healthy! So here it goes. I hope you will enjoy my journey.
To be continued.